Days of My Life

If you ever start to feel like I'm drifting away, Maybe it's just the fact that AP exams are coming up in about a week and I feel so unprepared. Maybe it's just the fact that I have three subject tests this Saturday, none of which I am prepared for. Lack of preparation really gets to me these days. I wouldn't say that I've procrastinated, though, because that would mean that I'd be studying the day before each exam, which I have long since learned it not at all good. For the past two days, I have felt so disturbingly unsettled. I really want to go run just to clear my head of everything, even if it's only for an hour. An hour's relaxation is much better than an hour's more of stress, right? You know, after having had some contemplation on it, I realize that life's actually been good to me. I mean, there're always the despicable downs (like now, dagnabbit), but in general, it's all good. Little things bother me far more than they should, a...

Ah, today, for the first time in a long time, I finally hung out with my baby cousins. Of course, they were loud and bothersome, but I had fun; I came home feeling very rejuvenated, surprisingly. They kept asking me to carry them and kept pulling on my sweatshirt. Whenever I said I needed to leave, it was as if they tried to bribe me to stay there for longer. And then, the youngest one asked me, "Wendy, will you be my best friend? Every day? Because I like you." What a sweetie. Too bad I talk smack about her all the time. But it's okay. School kills, man. I was so excruciatingly sleepy and exhausted yesterday and today. Yawns abound, I tell you. While at Castelar, I yawned and yawned and almost got fired! Although, I don't think it's possible for a volunteer to get fired, contrary to what they have frequently claimed. Anyway, I need to sleep this weekend. Sleep for hours and study for a bit. AP exams are upcoming! As is the SAT, darn it. You know what? After AP ex...

We're a picture In my mind When I want to find you I just want to close my eyes You'll never be that far from me So don't say goodbye 'cause You'll never be that far from me I am feeling much better today. Actually, I am perfectly fine today. Thank goodness for sleep--it works miraculous wonders, very honestly speaking. Too bad I missed calc, though, because I have absolutely no idea whatsoever how to do today's atrocious assignment, darn it. Who knows what happened in chem? Every other class, I don't care about. So I finally watched full episodes of "Big Bang Theory," "How I Met Your Mother," AND "Gossip Girl" tonight. All at the same time simply because I can. ;) "One Tree Hill" I am missing, but whatever; that storyline goes slowly anyway. Speaking of slow storylines, I want to be able to watch at least a bit of "General Hospital" every week just to catch up on what's going on. (No, I am not an old lad...

As of this moment, I am 95% sure that I won't run the marathon. Who knows if I even "qualify" for it anymore anyway? :( I never, ever want to go through the pain I went through today again. Never, ever again. It was excruciating, it was heartbreaking, and it was, in a way, almost life threatening (for me, anyway). Quite frankly, I didn't really care about the weather, because quite frankly, I couldn't feel anything, including my two arms. My feet hurt, my thighs were sore, and my calves were numb; my heart was slowing down, my lungs were almost compressing abnormally, and my mind was just so freaking messed up. I lacked any strength at all, and I lacked the courage and motivation. Really, I just wanted to get picked up around the twelfth mile. I couldn't take it anymore, so we walked for about five miles straight. It hurt. It really hurt. The pain was one of a kind, a kind that I never, ever want to experience again. Ever. Because it hurt more than anything th...

18 miles tomorrow; wish me luck.

Even though I slept nine hours last night, I have been wanting to just go back to sleep all day. I absolutely, utterly, wholeheartedly, entirely, FREAKING HATE being sick. My throat hurts, my nose is congested, my eyes are teary, and my appetite is nonexistent. I can't taste or smell anything. I can barely see clearly whenever I get up. It hurts when I swallow, it hurts when I inhale, it hurts when I do anything. I HATE being sick. And there's not even the slightest possibility of denial this time. :( I don't even know how it happened. I went to sleep two nights ago just fine, and then woke up in the middle of that night with a very bothersome earache. A couple of hours later, I started sneezing and blowing my nose like insanity. Goodness gracious. I hadn't been sick in about two years, too! And the last time I was ever this sick? Five years ago, thank you very much. Argh grr roar. Ugh! I'm going to go to sleep at nine o' clock tonight. There's nothing good ...

I heard a sad song playing on the radio About a girl who loves him But she never really let it show Outside the rain keeps falling down my window I'm crying inside, gotta see you tonight I understand and if somebody broke your heart before But it wasn't me who left the pieces laying on the floor But it's me who's out here in the rain knocking at your door Paying the price for all of his lies I'd write you a song but I can't find the words to say To tell you what's on my mind But even a symphony can't say what you mean to me So how can I, how can I give you All of me When all I get is half of you Now tell me what am I supposed to do If all I get is half of you If all you give is half of you Wanna be the reason that you never look for love again Baby girl, I wanna be your lover, your best friend How we gonna make it if you never gonna let me in What can I do to prove that my love is true I keep holding on for as long as this gonna...