Days of My Life

I don't need to try to please everybody. As valiant and commendable of an effort as one can make, it is impossible to make everybody happy. While happiness can ensue via acts of service for others, I've come to realize that it also has to be actively pursued by asking myself what I want .  A good relationship with my parents is just as important as a good relationship with anybody else. In middle school, I began to "rebel", and in doing so, I of course often upset my parents, and began to communicate with them less and less about my daily goings-on. Meanwhile, I began to develop deep relationships with friends and later romantic relationships with boy(s). A part of me thought that it was a trade-off--either relationship with my parents or relationships with my friends. And I made a choice. But really, there was truly no reason it couldn't have been both.  Not every relationship (the general sense of the word, not just the romantic sense) needs to stay a relatio...

It has been almost two years since I began my journey of personal development. It’s been long, and it’s been a long time coming, though “development” connotes an ongoing process, one that doesn’t end. As my colleague once wisely stated, “Mastery is a direction, not a destination.” While it would be easy for me to readily negate everything that I’ve done and the progress I’ve made by saying, “Meh, I haven’t accomplished that much,” that would be giving myself too little credit. I have reevaluated and reflected a great deal, and admittedly, I also have never cried so much and so often before this whole process began—sometimes good and happy tears, other times--simply sad tears. Here are a handful of things I have learned. This list is not meant to impart wisdom or evoke sympathy. I merely want to share some of the recurring themes that go on in my head since my journey began as well as some of the recurring themes that go on in my head for the journey that continues. Everybody has...

"I told her I was lost in this world, and she smiled, because she was too, we were all lost somehow, but we didn't care, we had, in the chaos, found each other." - Atticus "Don't give up now, chances are your best kiss your hardest laugh and your greatest day are still yet to come." - Atticus  "Self-love is so important; I don't want to be in my elderly years, flicking through old pictures of myself and at the last moment realising how beautiful I truly was." - Meggan Roxanne "Give people time. Give people space. Don't beg anyone to stay. Let them roam. What's meant for you will always be yours." - Reyna Biddy "Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have." - TheGoodQuote

Vulnerable . A word that I rarely ever used, especially to describe my state of mind or being, prior to my current job. One of the main things we do is teach and help leaders develop the eight characteristics of greatness, and vulnerability is one. In years prior, I had periodically seen and characterized myself as "a sensitive soul". Nonetheless, I would hide it behind the jokes and the laughter. It was really only when I watched sad scenes in movies or shows that I showed my sensitive side. Or when I would occasionally get upset about something that someone said about me. But in the past year of learning about the world and learning about myself (not mutually exclusive), I've realized that it's okay to be vulnerable and to show vulnerability. It's hard, especially when we grow up being told to not show vulnerability, which is a sign of weakness, and that we might be stepped on by doing so...among other things. I don't know how it works for our clients or...

Sherry: "I've typed it so many times, but I still don't know how to spell 'Hors d'Oeuvres.'"     Me: "It's spelled a-p-p-e-t-i-z-e-r."

This week, Ace disappointed me for the fourth time in the four months I have had him. The first three months were a perfectly--and surprisingly--smooth ride. And then I guess he started to grow up, and not only got comfortable, but also learned to take things for granted. The first time was several weeks ago, when I had been in a rush to get out of the apartment, and I snapped at him right before I left. While I was away for an hour, I felt unreasonably guilty, so I was already planning to give him a small piece of rotisserie chicken as a treat--or an apology--upon return. After going up and down the stairs with several loads of Costco merchandise, I walked into the kitchen, and saw a huge mess on the floor. He had jumped and somehow gotten the tied-up bag of food-trash out of the sink, and ate nearly all of its contents: half-eaten tortillas (because I don't eat tacos properly, so they say), saucy Styrofoam containers, browned banana peels... There was a myriad of things that...

The first time I ever felt empowered was the second day of sixth grade. On the first day, my mom had taken her morning off work to drive me to school, from Chinatown to Northridge, in order to give me my insulin injections for breakfast and lunch, and to make sure the school nurse knew everything she needed to about me. Nurse Sue was astonished that my mom had gone to such an extent to take care of me. "Astonished" might be too nice of a word--I think she was shocked, and perhaps even abhorred. I was in sixth grade now, and I had never given myself an injection, despite having had T1D for 10 years now?! Now that I think back on it, I myself am ashamed. The second day of school, my mom did the same thing--she took the morning off work and drove another almost 40 miles to school. Again, she waited in the nurse's office while I had my morning classes, and when lunch time rolled around, I entered the nurse's office wondering how we would ever resolve this major inconven...